BLUE COUP D’ETAT

(more mismatched words and images)

Life seems like a senseless stream of events, can’t quite get a grasp on what’s going on. Used to be a burning hope for love, used to be the reason I got up in the morning. Now (only in these moments because I know this too will pass) I feel the desire for distance, numbness, not caring–it is a trap, later I’ll regret this indulgence. This is not to say that I appear unhappy, on the contrary I laugh and smile often but feel cut adrift, floating without aim, dreamless.
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The calming waters roll off my cheeks, sit on my skin, pores open like sunflowers eating the sun.
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If the leaves turned blue and grey I could say they were the color of your eyes

If the sky felt soft and warm on my skin I could say your breath haloed my face

If absence were presence you’d be here